Oh, So They Come and Go... Again?

December 31, 2022

Honestly this year has been one of the toughest years of my life but that’s why I love tomorrow! (Shout out to my good sis Gloria Hallelujah). The 20 somethings ain’t no joke and it’s only my 3rd year out here! Lost a lot of my close friends, girlies I had in my current imaginary wedding lol. Lost my best friend over some petty stuff on both ends. That probably hurt me the most if I’m being honest, because it was ‘09 ‘til we die! The worst part of friendship break ups is pretending that the breakup never happened, only so that you don’t look like the one who’s upset about it. Pretending that life easily moves on with them or without them, when it doesn’t. Pretending that you don’t have history when you have lots. Pretending that you don’t miss them when you do or at least the bond you believe you had with them. When you can’t send them memes you know y’all would be weak about. Or send them takes on tv shows y’all share together. Or calling them up when you’re procrastinating doing homework for a little pick me up.

The reality of it all is losing friends is tough! Especially when you know and understand the value of a true friend.

I guess friendships ending are for moments of growth. Like I said in my previous post, you learn what to look for in a real friend. Someone who doesn’t use you or talk about you or pretend in your face. They call you back and don’t consciously befriend someone who has tainted your name. If this reads as salty it’s because I am/was (edit, lol, I am actively working through it. By the end of this blog post the saltiness has gone away, I started writing this when I was in my feelings and when I proofread when I got to the end I no longer felt the same.)

I did a quick Google search on “bible definition of friendship,” because who do I run to when my life feels like it's in a disarray? The greatest friend of them all, JESUS! And to be quite honest chile, the BIble does not play about friendships! Proverbs 18:24 in the NLT version says, “There are “friends” who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother.” Did y’all catch them quotations around the word friend?! Proverbs 17:17 also in the NLT version says, “A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need.” and my favorite one of them all from Proverbs 27:9 in the TPT version, “Sweet friendships refresh the soul and awaken our hearts with joy, for good friends are like the anointing oil that yields the fragrant incense of God’s presence.” WHEW. I’m also gonna put the MSG version of Proverbs 27:9, “Just as lotions and fragrance give sensual delight, a sweet friendship refreshes the soul.” Like c’mon! How powerful and important are friends??!!

Friendships are not draining. Friendships are not sometime-y. Friendships are not stingy. Friendships are not character assassins groups.

Friendships ARE sweet, loyal, refreshing, hearty, joyful!!!!! Like wow! Imagine having a friend like that (outside of Jesus lol).

As I typed this post, a thought popped in my head about how I’ve always wanted my friendships to run so deep that my future kids are also friends with my friends’ future kids. I decided to use Google again to search Jonathan and David’s friendship because they have one of the greatest friendships in the bible (their souls were knitted!) and I stumbled across this verse, “At last Jonathan said to David, “Go in peace, for we have sworn loyalty to each other in the Lord’s name. The Lord is the witness of a bond between us and our children forever.’” 1 Samuel 20:42 NLT. That’s BIBLE! Friendships ordained by God, have longevity! Just like all things God created. Friends that God joins together are meant to be sustainable for generations.

Friendships are important to God or else he wouldn’t have given us instructions on how to be a friend or examples of great friendships. Reevaluate your friendships. Pray about them. Ask God to teach you how to be a better friend. Ask God for better friends. Ask God for friendships that only he could have orchestrated. Don’t take your friendships lightly; take them seriously. Yes, it’s THAT important. Don’t let your “friends” take your friendships lightly. If they do then, I hope by now you know what to do. Once God teaches you how to be a better friend, practice being a friend, put what He taught you into action.

With that being said I hope 2023 is all you ever dreamed of and MORE. I pray that you allow God into those places you don’t necessarily want Him to invade and let him take over. Here’s to letting GOD, God. Happy New Year!

Stay Blessed,

Alyssa